Parent Put Downs: What do you do when your mom talks you down?

I'm so mad at my mom. She called me lazy. Put downs really suck. It hurts so bad when she talks to me that way. I know I do more work than some of my friends. Most of them watch more t.v. than I do. I was watching my soap the other day, General Hospital, and my mom came home from work. She was furious I hadn't vacuumed the kitchen. When a teen gets home from school, the last thing on her mind is "What work do I have to do?"

The natural inclination is to eat and relax after having to pay attention all day. Well, my mom turned the t.v. off while I was watching it. That made me furious. If someone did that to her, she'd have a conniption. And then, on top of that, calling me a name. Just because I didn't do what she said when I came home from school, it doesn't mean my personality for life is lazy and good for nothing. I really wish she would stop labeling me like that! If someone said something to her about the way she sits down and has a cocktail when she gets home from work while my father makes dinner, she'd go bananas. Maybe she should just think about that!

Do you have the same type of problem with your mom? How do you handle it?

Few Colleges Follow NIAAA Advice to Prevent Student Drinking

Few Colleges Follow NIAAA Advice to Prevent Student Drinking
A study is published in the journal Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research.

One commenter at this site wrote:

Posted by Profbam on 02 Aug 10 01:15 PM EDT
...In the long run, the solution to our problem lies in the middle schools that sorely need an effective alcohol/drug program (DARE is not one) that continues through high school. That requires time and money for teacher training and is never going to happen. Thus, the students come to college already drinking, just now they don't have to shape their drinking around the presence of their parents...

What do you think? Do you think students who drink in college were already drinking in high school and man y who drink in high school started in middle school? Do you think public schools should be responsible for teaching the dangers of drugs and alcohol in a more comprehensive way than a token program like Drug Awareness Week that we have in Texas schools?

Back to School Gossip

Back to school is such crap. Everyone's trying to outdo everyone with the best outfit. Shopping isn't even fun because you feel fat or ugly or you can't find what you need. Where's the perfect purse, nail polish, socks, jeans? They can't really be found and if they are found they cost way too much! I saw the cutest jeans at Anthopologie, but they cost $172!!!! Get real! They're not Buckle. At least Gap's shirts are great colors and great prices. But I heard they employ underage workers in foreign countries, so I even have to feel guilty shopping there.

More back to school crap. Everyone looks at you and you don't know what they're thinking. They might have had a conversation about you online just last night. You don't really know what people are saying behind your back. If they're not talking about you, then that's not good either. That means you're not important enough to talk about. What might they be saying? If you're dating someone, you can be sure they'll say a mouth or earful about that. You don't deserve him. He doesn't deserve you. You two don't deserve each other. What bus is it of theirs?

What about teachers? Last year I had this teacher everyone liked, but he turned out to be a real jerk. Do teachers even care about students at all? I like this new teacher I have, Ms. Smith. She seems really good. My problem isn't whether she cares about me or not but whether I'm going to disappoint her. Have you ever felt that way? Scared you would disappoint an adult you liked? It's really pathetic I know, but I'm not sure I can keep up with two AP English classes back to back. I'm beginning to wonder if I should have done this, but I just have to get out of this school. I can't stand everyone looking at me all the time, and I don't know what they're all saying but I know it's not good.

Would you try to graduate early? Do you think it's a good or bad idea?

Group Drug Therapy Can Be Counterproductive for Teens

Group Drug Therapy Can Be Counterproductive for Teens

Group addiction treatment can actually lead to more drug use by teens if they are casual users placed in sessions with more experienced addicts, Time magazine reported July 16.

"Just putting kids in group therapy actually promotes greater drug use," said Nora Volkow, director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA).

Schumer Calls for FTC to Investigate Alcoholic Energy Drink Marketing

Schumer Calls for FTC to Investigate Alcoholic Energy Drink Marketing

Certain brands of alcoholic energy drinks are marketed with the intent of appealing to underage drinkers, charged Sen. Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.) in calling for an investigation by the U.S. Federal Trade Commission (FTC).

The Associated Press reported July 11 that Schumer singled out Joose and Four Loko brand energy drinks, which he said are packaged in colorful cans to resemble nonalcoholic energy drinks and fail to prominently disclose their alcohol content -- which can be up to 12 percent by volume.

The drinks are sold in 24-ounce cans, in flavors like grape and orange, and cost around $2.50.

"The style and promotion of these products is extremely troubling," Schumer wrote to the FTC. "Frankly, it looks to me as if manufacturers are trying to mislead adults and business owners who sell these products, while at the same time actively courting underage drinkers. This type of marketing is, at minimum, grossly irresponsible."

The maker of Joose said the products are only marketed to drinkers over age 21 and don't target college students.

How Do You Have Fun at a Party?

I told you awhile back I went to a keg party with Tina. She tricked me into going when we were supposed to be going to the movies. I've been to several parties in the last couple years and to a couple concerts. The focus is always drinking and drugs. Why does everyone feel they have to drink or do drugs to have a good time? Now I don't want to drink, but when the pressure gets turned up, I think I need to get turned on.

Are you someone who thinks drinking is fun? Or are you someone who gets high on life and doesn't drink?

I wish I'd never tried my first drink. But now, when I'm in a social situation and there's alcohol, I feel like I almost have to drink. Like I can't get by without it. Will I ever stop feeling this way? I want to quit, but it's just so hard.

I used to think drinking made me more attractive to boys and that it was easier to talk to them when I drank.  After I threw up all over the middle of the floor in front of tons of kids at a school dance, that should have signaled to me drinking was unattractive. Also, at a concert last year, this guy I was with, walked away from me after I got drunk, like he was embarrassed or something. The kicker should have been the accident  I had in my parents' Volvo. I totaled the car and am working to pay it off. I'm grounded for life and can't drive for several months.

So, you know, I just wish I could stop drinking. But when I went to that party last week, and Brittany trash talked me, it was just like I had no choice. I wish someone could help me. I don't have Jerry. I can't tell my parents. I'm going to try to talk to my ex-best friend Celia. She has to trust me again. I can't survive if we're not friends.

What do you do when you need help? Do you turn to a crutch like alcohol or drugs?

Eclipse Message at the End of Movie: I Don't Fit In

Bella said her reason for becoming a vampire was because she had never fit in. All her life she felt odd, different. She didn't want the same things as other teens. She didn't want to go shopping, go out and party, gossip, go to the prom, any of the things high school students do. Have you ever had the feeling you don't fit in? I wonder if everyone feels that way and most people you think are just like everyone else, are just better at pretending or conforming.

What causes the feeling you don't fit in? Is it feeling like you're not as good as other people? Is it your individuality clashing with the different teen groups and their values? Is it temporary depression or insecurity? Or do some people never develop the ability fit into the world?

Maybe fitting in is just feeling comfortable with who you are. But to feel like you belong, don't you have to...well...belong to something or someone? Making connections with other people is based on having something in common, right? So, I guess you have to establish who you are, then find someone who accepts you and who you can appreciate for their similar ideas about something you think.

Bella is going to become inhuman, soulless, in order to fit in. Would vampires like Edward go to heaven if they were real? Are they "good" enough because they don't drink human blood? What do we do in the real world when we don't fit in? We can't become vampires. It would be unrealistic that some gorgeous hunk of a vampire could find my blood irresistible but would be unselfish enough not to drink blood like other vampires do. Fiction!

It makes sense then that thing my mom always said to me, "You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else." She always tells me I don't have anything to offer in a relationship anyway until I'm strong and value myself.

Excuse me while I cry a little writing this. Jerry accepted me for who I was even though I wasn't perfect. If I hadn't taken him for granted and resisted giving him all the attention he wanted, I would still have him now. What do you do when you figure it out, but then screw it up? That's my problem now. I can look back and see how I fit in, but now I don't. I want to get back to that point, but when you mess up in high school, it's really hard to change your image.

The only way I can see to make it this year is to go out with Chris. He's a senior, sort of popular, and sort of hot. Why do I feel like I have to be with somebody to be somebody?